The insanity is creeping in

I hate this feeling :( I just want to crawl under a rock and sleep for a few months.
I have about 4 days until Jared is home and it still feels like for ever away, and he has only been gone for a month. But this has been the hardest month in a LONG time. I feel like the boys are revolting against me, knowing that I feel pretty helpless right now. Just the general issues that come along with their ages. Rylan broke his bed and Gabe fell out of his crib. So now they are both on their mattresses on the floor, leading to a much longer bed time because they just play until they pass out. Going anywhere is a struggle. Gabe screams bloody murder for no real reason, the second we walk into a store. Rylan constantly asks me for things and then starts BAWLING when I tell him no. Its not like getting stuff/treats for him is a norm, its in fact RARE!
Our trip to the farmers market today was crap, people are rude and Gabe was screaming.
To top it all of I have 1 day of school left, with 4 finals crammed into the day. We are building Water treatment rooms in groups of four. We have only had 3 days to work on it, so I volunteered to take it home and finish up. In this week our teacher has made everything as unpleasant as possible. We got chewed out Tuesday morning, because he got in trouble from the dean. I guess when the computer people came in to replace the computers in the class(which have been there for 10 years) the key boards and under the computers was "disgusting". Excuse me but NO. Our teacher MAKES us clean the computers!!! Under the monitors, AND in the keyboards. So we got bitched at for that and can no longer eat in there. Not only that we cant even bring food in, cant even bring water in! While one of the girls was gone he took her food(that was tied up in a plastic bag) and locked it in his room! One word of advice to him though, dont mess with a stressed out Brazilian woman. She does not care that you are a teacher(who is the same age as her), she will tell you off!
So this same day they are painting the outside of our building(and yest our school is SO poor) and had all the windows taped off. In a feat of amazement it has been HOT here in WA. So we are baking our buts off, painting and gluing stuff and he refuses to let us even have water.
He then kicks us out of the calls during the "lunch hour"(this is supposed to be college for Christs sake). I had planned on staying during lunch to work on it, so I scrambled to grab what I could to take it outside and work on it.
He did this every day.
So on top of this water treatment room we have to know EVERYTHING about but yet haven't actually been taught ANYTHING about, we have phlebotomy test, professionalism, and vascular access.
Maybe I just dont know much about college but are teachers not supposed to teach you??
I mean pretty much all he has done is shown us a power point on each subject.
We work out of a book for phlebotomy, which he does not go over or anything, its self taught basically. AND The book we have been working out of is NOT the one he is testing us from!!
Professionalism-He gave us a bunch of stacks of papers, then we watched 12 videos that had to do with "professionalism" and were a WASTE of time.
Vascular access-stacks of papers again, video, and canulating rubber tubing.
Water treatment-A power point and this model and reading our "core curriculum" which is what he is testing us from the other stuff. He told those doing clinical to have their preceptors teach them! Every person said their preceptor didn't know anything either!!
So Im stressing about getting all I need done, and passing my classes.
Im just looking forward to this being over and Jared being home, even though he will be leaving again in a month or two and then deploying shortly after that.

This has put the worst taste for school in my mouth.

1 wk down 3lbs gone!

So I started working out on Tuesday I think it was. Started my first night with a yoga ball core excersise. I have absolutely not core lol so I wanted to get that back to work before starting 30 day shred again. The subsequent days I 30DS except for Thursday and Friday. Thursday I just had to much studying to do and I was in so much pain lol. Friday I totally intended to but then my night went to crap. Apparently Jared was able to get on FB with the kindle. I missed it Thursday because my phone does not show every status update. I missed him again Friday even though we were posting at the same time, Im not sure he saw the comments I was leaving him, trying to get him to stay on. So I was just really depressed after that and lost my motivation.
Saturday I decided to do my work out while Gabe was napping because I was having a friend come over for dinner that night. We also went to the park so I got some extra work in there!!
Ive been drinking SO MUCH water too! At least a liter a day!
When I weighed Tuesday I was 154 and some change. I stepped on the scale this morning and was 151!!!!!!
I haven't been here in about a year lol!

Im so excited to be seeing results which is keeping me motivated.
Im also setting mini goals this time.
Instead of focusing on the 20-25lbs I want to loose, Im taking it 5lbs at a time.
Ive almost met my first goal of 150lbs and hope to achieve my goal of 145lbs by the time Jared gets home from ntc.
So I have about 2wks to loose 5lbs which I think is totally doable!!